Number 10: The overweight family in front of you at Wal-Mart that buys $300 worth of top-shelf, name-brand groceries with food stamps, then pays for their second buggy full of toys (that your kids can’t have), brand new bicycles, their beer and cigarettes with cash.
Number 9: The rude cashier (no not all of the cashiers, just the rude ones, and you know who you are) that doesn’t even bother to greet you and acts like you are a waste of his/her time. Seriously, you should be glad you have a job, a lot of people don’t, and I heard you speak, your really not even intelligent enough to have this one. Be thankful and smile.
Number 8: The lazy mailman that doesn’t bother to deliver your package to your house/apartment, but rather puts that dreaded pink slip in your mailbox instead forcing you to drive to the post office to pick it up. If I wanted to drive to the store to pick something up, I sure as hell wouldn’t have purchased it online and paid shipping.
Number 7: The dumb kid in the electronics department that can’t show you where anything is other than the video games. Hmmm….think maybe he spends too much time there?
Number 6: The other last-minute shoppers. Look, it’s not my fault you waited until the last minute any more than it’s your fault that I waited. There’s no need to be an ass to me (or anyone else for that matter). Next year, start in July, then you won’t have to deal with the crowds!
Number 5: The shovers. Come on people, there are 100 babies on that shelf, did you really have to shove me and my buggy aside just to get that one? You (and your mom) should be ashamed!
Number 4: The over-the-top sales signs. Give us a little credit. We do shop the rest of the year as well. We are completely aware that you raised the prices just before the holidays so that you could so dramatically slash them for us. We might have to purchase the items at these inflated prices, but we’re not buying your bullshit too!
Number 3: All of the buggies all over the parking lot (some taking up the only available parking spot) and the lack of same in the store. Again, someone’s not doing their job!
Number 2: The germs. There are so many germs running around in the stores and malls, and people just let their snot-nosed kids touch everything. Gross, y’all know I’m a germophobe. If you or your kids are sick, stay home! Don’t ruin our holidays too!
Number 1: The inquisitor. This person will ask just any old body about an item on a store shelf. It’s rating, the warranty, battery life, likeability, you name it, they ask it. And they always seem to ask ME. Do I really look like I work at every store I enter? Am I wearing a vest? Do I have on a name tag? If these answer to any of these last questions is NO, look for someone else. I’m sure I can’t help you, but I could lie if you’d like!
Christy Gossett, managing editor of SoFabFood and creator of the healthy living blog, Insanity Is Not An Option, is a WAHM of 6 kids ranging in age from 27 to 8. She enjoys sharing her heart-healthy, low sodium recipes to help others with dietary restrictions enjoy a flavorful life while maintaining a healthy diet.
Hey y'all! I'm Christy and I'm glad you could stop by. Have a seat, grab a drink or a straight jacket, and join me as I share heart-healthy recipes, stories and life lessons about my insanely large family, and whatever else pops into my hot mess of a mind! Read More…