Happy New Year….I Have Brown Hair!

For some of you (that don’t know me well), the fact that I now have brown hair is no big deal. But it IS a big deal. You see Christy without blonde hair is like Barbie without boobs (or well…blonde hair), Sonny without Cher, peanut butter without jelly (oh the horror), the ocean without water. Yes, this is a big deal! But it was a new year, a new decade, so I decided it was time for a new me. I’ve been sporting my I’ll-be-twenty-forever summer blonde for my entire life (with the brief exception of the red week but we won’t go there). But let’s face it, I won’t be 20 forever, matter of fact, I haven’t been 20 in forever, so it was time for a change. Yesterday, I decided I would take the plunge, it is only hair after all and I can always undo it right? Right!
So, being on the tight budget that I am, I headed to Walmart. I bought the expensive stuff, a lovely shade of medium brown in a cool tone to avoid the reds I spoke of earlier. I called my oldest sister as I always do before doing something silly to my hair because she does know best when it comes to these things. She gave me all of the tips to a successful color, I listened, but did not follow them all. I am not that patient, she knew that so of course I’m sure she was already thinking up her back-up plan to “fix” me just in case. I conditioned first, dried my hair, colored, waited the appropriate 25 minutes, lathered, rinsed, repeated. I conditioned again and I emerged from the shower as what I thought would be a beautiful brunette. Well, THAT didn’t work. I dried my hair only to find a not-so-lovely shade of mousey blonde highlighted with what appeared to be blue, green & silvery highlights. No this was not good! My husband only snickered a little as I walked out and suggested I might want to go back blonde. Bug of course told me she loved the new hue (of course she did, it would make others laugh AT ME). Oh well, it was over for the night and I would do nothing about it until the morning. As a matter of fact, I had told myself (and my sister) that since I don’t work outside of the home, I would wait a full two weeks to make any changes if anything went wrong as that was what was best for me (and my hair). So I went to bed a mousey blonde, blue, green, silvery mess. OK, day 1 of 2011 not so successful, but I had my health! It’s all good!
Woke up, everyone fed, kitchen cleaned up, toys picked up, time to shower. I wash my lovely locks once, twice, three times. Again, condition because that is key! I step out of the shower convinced that this monstrosity that once was my blonde hair was now shed of all hues that belong in the rainbow. I lotion, brush my teeth, then my hair. I blow dry and well, let’s just say that now I had a somewhat ashier tone of the bluish, greenish, greyish hues. Nope, the washing did NOT fix the problem, but I will wait another 2 weeks, that’s what I said. So I throw the ugly crap up into a ponytail, put on my makeup and spend time with the family. My husband keeps reminding me that he really wants some tennis shoes so he can go running. He even takes the time to look online what the local Academy has and considering we have a $25 gift card and the shoes are only $30, he assures me that we can afford them and that it would be great if I picked them up for him “if I was going out anyway”. Going out anyway, well whatever would I be going out for? Must come up with some reason to go out. Oh I know….HAIR COLOR! Point in fact, it is his fault that I couldn’t wait the two full weeks I had promised myself (and my sister), if I had to go out, there must be a reason other than tennis shoes, seriously tennis shoes are no reason! So now, Bug in tow, I was on a mission! First stop, Academy, Reebok, size 10.5…done! That was easy, now off to Walgreens we go!
Enter Walgreens, hair color aisle #3. Just me and Bug. In and out. Cat said to pick a golden tone that would cancel out the other “crap” going on. I don’t think that’s literally what she said, but that was the gist. So I begin my search, I am focused, I am ready, I hear Bug talking….I always hear Bug talking, she never stops talking….how can I concentrate on this ever-important decision? Well, I shouldn’t have brought her, this was too important, but I did so now I must deal. Shhhh, little Bug, shhhhh! I finally narrowed my choice down to 6 boxes, then 5…4….3….2….3….4…..2….3…..2…..1! YES….this was the fix, I will go with this deep brown natural shade, this will do it and it will fade. After all, last night I had died my hair medium brown and after rinsing, it had turned dark blonde (much lighter than the shade indicated) with of course those other lovely colors that I am through talking about! So this DEEP brown will do the trick. It will cancel the rainbow and actually give me brown. Purchase, mount horse (OK so we got in the car), and head home to complete our mission!
We get home and of course, I text Cat again asking for any last advice before I take the dive. Conversation involving the Wizard of Oz, I’m frightened Auntie Em, the Lollipop Guild, then the dreaded “Leave it in for 45 minute” text came across my screen. What? 45 minutes? The box says 25. It’s in my hair and my hair already looks black after 10 minutes…YES BLACK! So I send back the obvious message “seriously?” and the assuring reply comes back “yes, 45 minutes, it may even turn black on your head, but it will fade A LOT”. So I’m good. And I continue to time and swear I won’t look in the mirror until after I rinse (of course, I looked at least 50 times and it kept getting blacker). Panic stricken, I wait the full 45 minutes, turn on the shower, hop in at precisely the right time and begin to rinse. Black stuff is spewing everywhere in my shower, it was like a blood-bath in there and I wondered why I had ever began this adventure. Ah yes, that’s right, I’m a mom, not 20, time to start looking the part! So I rinse, I lather, I condition, then I emerge ready to face the new not-so-blonde, not-so-blue (hopefully) me! After lotioning (yes I do that quite often), I take the towel off my head. It’s dark, I mean really dark, dare I say BLACK? I begin to blow dry because of course hair always looks darker when wet. I must say, this time, it turned out a beautiful shade of brown, VERY dark brown. It has shimmering highlights of gold. It is lovely! But it’s on my head, it’s taken over my blonde locks. I am somewhat in shock. I emerge to find my family wondering what their take would be (it’s always interesting around here). B likes it, he seems to like it a lot (he might be lying, he does love me after all). Bug tells me she loves my new dark hair (yea, not buying that, she told me that last time and it was blueish green). Bubby stops, stares, looks a little stunned, then smiles and starts playing again, that is a good sign! So we continue on with our evening, eat dinner, clean up and nothing else is said. I wonder what they are all secretly thinking but I don’t ask. I won’t ask. I will wear this color for the next two weeks at least, maybe it will fade, maybe it will grow on me, maybe I’ll be blonde again in a couple of weeks. Who knows? But I will give it the full two weeks, new year, new decade, new me, even if only temporarily!
So what’s my point to all of this rambling? Hell I don’t know other than to say that we all need to take chances, make changes, and forge forward. Today it was my hair, tomorrow who knows? Happy new year to all of you! Oh and did I mention? I have brown hair? Really, really, really brown hair!
About Christy

Christy Gossett, managing editor of SoFabFood and creator of the healthy living blog, Insanity Is Not An Option, is a WAHM of 6 kids ranging in age from 27 to 8. She enjoys sharing her heart-healthy, low sodium recipes to help others with dietary restrictions enjoy a flavorful life while maintaining a healthy diet.

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