Step Away From The Washer and No One Gets Hurt

Obviously after reading my last post about my current situation, y’all knew I was going to blow.  We should have taken bets.  When was it going to happen?  How was it going to happen?  What would be THE breaking point?
Personally, I thought it would take longer than this.  I’m usually incredibly tolerant so I would have given myself a full month.  If you bet against that statistic, you were right!  I can admit when I’m wrong!
But the thing that finally set me off is the most shocking to me.  Laundry?  That’s right…it’s all about the washing machine!
Over the past almost 3 weeks (funny he still keeps saying he’s only been here a week…this has been one long week), I have been tolerant, kind, patient, helpful, and quiet (well quiet for me).  But tonight, I kind of, sort of, well probably actually, blew!
You see for the past 3 weeks, I have been going about my daily chores.  I have been working, cooking, cleaning, doing the laundry (when I am allowed to get to my own washer and dryer since “someone” is always washing one or two items at a time…on the hot cycle which leaks…no matter how many times they have been asked to wash full loads…on the COLD cycle), vacuuming more than normal, scrubbing toilets more than normal, loading and unloading the dishwasher more than normal, pushing in chairs WAY more than normal, and cleaning up general messes around the house way more than normal.  
And I’ve been dealing with issues with the kids more than normal.  You see, their world is not normal.  So of course (since they are only 3 and 5), they have been showing out and I have been “on” them more than normal.  Some of this I expected when B opened our home up to the BIL.  Some of this I could not have expected even in worse case scenario thinking.    
Let’s get to the blowing point, shall we?  A full day of work, cleaning, taking care of the kids…regular stuff.  I go to get the mail and what is this I see?  The power bill came in the mail?  Oh this should be fun!  It is a full $40 extra with only one week (seriously only one week of his visit, not HIS one week, an actual calendar week) of his visit.  Hmmm…wonder why?  I don’t wonder at all!  Lots and lots of one shirt washings, long hot showers, extended computer (read = chat with losers) use, pumping up air mattresses, running AC because he’s too hot (oh the horror), a gazillion extra dishwasher runs, etc, etc, etc.  
Let’s put this in perspective people.  $40 for one week = $160 a month…out of OUR pockets.  That’s right!  Let’s add that to the extra food, the added mess, the added aggravation, the kids acting up, the fact that this sullied my visit with my own mother, the fact that the ONE AND ONLY TIME I asked him to go to the store for me for diapers, it wasn’t convenient.  Yes, I have been VERY kind!

Fast forward!  B gets home.  I share the electric bill concerns with him.  I explain the laundry problem with him.  I make it very clear that washing one thing at a time (seriously who the heck does that?) is not only stupid, it’s costing us money.  I explain that my laundry is so incredibly behind because of my work schedule and this man’s love of the laundry schedule, I need to complete all of my laundry tonight.  
B acknowledges me.  He seems to understand.  It’s simple really.  I will do all of my laundry tonight…no interruptions.  So I head out for errands with one load in the washer, one in the dryer.  It’s all good!

I go to PetSmart, I head to Walmart, then on my way to the gas station to fill up the tank for my loving husband, I get a text!  “You take a vacation?”.  Seriously?  Did he just ask that?  OK, I wish.  It’s still all good.  Rather than answer in text, I call.  
It was light-hearted.  “Hey babe!  You sent me to PetSmart on the other side of the island, then I had to go to Walmart for the groceries which didn’t fit in the car because you have it and the trunk loaded with stuff.”.  These things take time!  Still light-hearted.  Somehow the laundry comes up.  Why?  How?  I have no clue, but it did and it went downhill from there!  
He says “I talked to ‘him’ about the laundry”.  I say “Speaking of that, are my clothes dry yet?”.  He says “I don’t know, I needed my shorts out of there and they’re dry so I took the clothes out of the dryer”.  OK, really?  I had to ask!  “Were my clothes dry?”.  “I don’t know, my shorts were.”.  ANNOYED!  He says “my clothes are in the dryer now”.  To which I spout with smile on my face “let me guess, he threw a load in the washer after that?”.  SWEAR…I was joking.  B chuckles and says “Yes he did”.  He chuckled?  WTF?   I reply “I don’t find that funny at all!”.  The silence was not kind.  

Quickly I say (with a smile on my face), “I’m at the gas station to fill up for you tomorrow.  I got pizzas to cook.  I’ll see you in a bit.  I love you.  CLICK”.  
Fast forward again.  I come home.  I carry up groceries.  I have beer thank goodness!  I’m sure I did NOT look happy but I said nothing.  He asked if there were more groceries in the car…of course there were!  He sensed a TONE in my voice.  He sensed it because it was there.  Apparently my TONE set him off (but honestly the wind sets him off at times so the fact that my TONE did does not really bother me).  For goodness sakes, my semi-wet clothes had been placed on my bed.  WET CLOTHES!

Any hoooo….from there it went something like this!  Groceries up the stairs (hubby only…God forbid the leach offer to help).  Hubby increasingly madder because he knows my earlier statements were very correct.  Hubby slams door.  Door locky thingy breaks.  BIL doesn’t move or comment.  I step outside.  I’m calm.  
5 minutes later?  Yup, I’m ready to blow, but still I refrain!  

I still said nothing as I removed the wet clothes from the dryer, put my clothes back in there, and replaced my clothes in said dryer (all the while ignoring the fact that I had told them both that I would wash all of my clothes tonight, including my towels), moving everything else around to accommodate.  I put the pizzas in the oven, and heard the front door slam.  
Oh no he did NOT!  He was mad at ME?  Could this be so?  Surely NOT!  I’d said nothing.  I was quiet.  And yet he was MAD because I had a TONE!  Oh balls…it was on now!  I waited quietly.  I said nothing for some time.  The offender sat quietly at his computer doing NOTHING as always and waiting for dinner to be ready.  Good times…good times!  But my husband was mad at ME!

Then I heard it.  Tick…tick…tick…yes, the time bomb was about to explode.  BUT much to my surprise?  It was a quiet, valid, no-scream explosion.  It went something like this (in my outside voice, but certainly was not a yell but the BIL was sitting right there so thank goodness he heard every word):
“So B…why did you get mad at ME?”…no comment!
Yea, that helps.  “You’ve got nothing to say because I’ve done nothing wrong?”….no comment!
And here we go…”I cook, I clean, I empty the self-loading and self-emptying dishwasher, I clean the self-cleaning toilets, I fold the self-folding laundry (when I get the chance to do my own laundry in my own house with my own washer and dryer), I push in the self-pushing in chairs (yes, I said that), I discipline my kids for things that they shouldn’t be disciplined for because an adult intruder taught them such shit, and I work more hours than anyone in this house!  No I do NOT make more money than anyone in this house, but if you want to compare hours?  Let’s roll with that!  And NOW, all I asked was to do all of MY laundry in one night.  Apparently that was too much to ask.  SORRY FOR THE TONE!”.  
And then there was silence.  A very long silence.  And I enjoyed it!  Because this time, I was right!
So if you can send me some positive vibes and sparkles, I’d appreciate it.  I have a LOSER IN THE HOUSE!  I’m hoping this nightmare will be over soon.  I want my life back.  And more importantly, I’m sad that I finally blew.  It was time I guess, but I try to avoid it at all costs.  Damn!  FAIL!
Here’s hoping that you can hold out with tough situations longer than I did.  And further hoping that you don’t let it hurt YOUR family!  I have.  And I’ve disappointed me. Don’t let the losers get you down!  
And step away from the washer and no one will get hurt! 

About Christy

Christy Gossett, managing editor of SoFabFood and creator of the healthy living blog, Insanity Is Not An Option, is a WAHM of 6 kids ranging in age from 27 to 8. She enjoys sharing her heart-healthy, low sodium recipes to help others with dietary restrictions enjoy a flavorful life while maintaining a healthy diet.

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  1. Lisa Harris says:

    Oh Christy, I know what it’s like to have someone in your house cause so much trouble. You can’t let it come between you and B though. Obviously someone has to talk to the intruder, whether it be you or B, but you know that.
    Sending sparkles my friend…lots and lots of sparkles.

  2. Sending lots of sparkly love AND a pair of size 10 shitkickers! Put ’em on and go to town 🙂 You are not his mom or maid. He either starts helping out or he goes dirty and hungry…easy peasy. Love ya girl!

  3. oh so sorry! Send lots of sparkles your way! And trust me, we all understand getting to that blowing point! Sometimes it is better to just let it all out and then be able to go on with your life. at least it always makes me feel better….hehehe. Hope things start to calm down soon! 🙂

  4. I think we have all been there. Hoping you days since have been more peaceful! Do whatever you need to blow off some steam!