When Times Get Rough…We All Look to the Sky

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Caution: Christy’s thinking again. Sappy post alert.

When times get rough or we’re posed with difficult situations and decisions, I think we all look to the sky. Don’t get me wrong, I think we all look for different reasons and all of them are valid. 

I’m not an overly spiritual person, but then again, I’m spiritual in my own way. I’ll be honest, I’m not a fan of organized religion. Too much judgement in my opinion which kind of defeats the lesson we learn from the book. I might be bitter, or battered, with this opinion, I don’t know. 
I was a single mom sitting in a church with her very young girls years ago while the God-fearing Christians talked behind my back because I could never have had a valid excuse for leaving the father of my children back then. They didn’t bother to ask why. They just judged. And so I turned to my own religion years ago and it works for me. 
I think we should all respect each other’s beliefs. I think that’s what the sky tells us to do. Some of us look to  the “traditional” God, some of us just embrace the peace, some of us look to another “God”, but when posed with a difficult situation…we all look up.
After a difficult day today, I looked up, and I saw beauty. I saw hope. I didn’t say a “traditional” prayer, but I prayed in my own way. I’ve been dealing with issues with my oldest daughter for some time now. She’s out of control. She only calls me when she “needs” me. By “need” I mean, she’s in trouble again and it’s my mission in life to get her out of trouble. 
She needs to look up.
But she wouldn’t listen. She can’t look at the same sky that I do. I should just “fix” this and move right along. But I looked up. I cried. I, for the first time in my life, refused to bail my own child out. It’s time. The sky told me so. 
I’m mean. I’m the worst mom on the planet. “OK, whatever…I’ll work it out Mom”. 
I hope you do, and remember to look up baby girl. It’s time you found some answers. This life isn’t working out for you. 
I refused to spend my entire bank account, my entire life, fixing her problems. She’s an adult. I guess it was time. The skies told me so. But my heart breaks and hope she decides to look up and forgive me and realize that at 23, it’s time to grow up and take responsibility.
At her age, I had a 2 year old and I learned to look up, ask for help, and listen to the advice I was given. That 2 year old needs to learn that the sky is her friend and as long as she looks up, she’ll find the answers she needs to fix all of her woes. 

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About Christy

Christy Gossett, managing editor of SoFabFood and creator of the healthy living blog, Insanity Is Not An Option, is a WAHM of 6 kids ranging in age from 26 to 7. She enjoys sharing her heart-healthy, low sodium recipes to help others with dietary restrictions enjoy a flavorful life while maintaining a healthy diet.

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  1. About 3 years ago, I was going to my dad about once a week for something. I had been out on my own and struggled and pulled out of it. But I got married and had a kid and moved to my hometown and we struggled again. I was usually only asking for $20 and always paid him back, but he was tired of it. He looked me in the eye and said, “you need to get this fixed”. I knew he was done and I knew better than to ask him anyway, but I had found it easier to go to him when I was in trouble and he was willing to help so I just never tried. That was the last time I asked him for money. He has helped, at my refusal and disgust,since then, but I have not asked. It was the best thing he could have ever done for us.

  2. Well that’s awful, but unfortunately not uncommon. I think we all get mixed up and forget that we are all just humans and no one knows the situation you were in… HUGGS and keep looking up…

  3. It sounds like you made a painful, but wise decision. You are attempting to give her the chance to stand on her own two feet and that is a very good thing. Hang in there Christy!

  4. clgossett says:

    Thanks Alicia. I’ve bailed her out so many times and actually have $5000 on the line for the next 11 months. It’s a long story. A 23 year old story in fact. Hard knox hurts momma harder than anyone I’m afraid. Stay in my corner, because I can use the strength and so can she.

  5. clgossett says:

    We do all get mixed up Rachel. I’ve been there and she’ll work her way out. Thanks for your support. I know you’ve had a rough year and that you understand. Can’t wait to meet you in May!

  6. Sorry to hear this Christy, but sometimes it takes having to learn yourself to really learn. It’s hard to see now but I’m sure she’ll be thanking you for it in the future. Bailing her out is the easy choice and you had to make the harder and more painful one. Sorry Christy!

  7. clgossett says:

    It was the right decision but it hurt. Thanks for your support. It’s been a long road. 🙁

  8. Wow Christy. I know that had to be hard. But thanks for sharing. It lets me know that even as a mom with a 4 and 5 year old, we have to make those tough decisions and in the end it’s going to be the best for our child. Even if it doesn’t feel like it to either party at the time. :/

  9. Kristy Still says:

    Hoping for the best for both you and your daughter! I know that has to be rough, ‘tough love’, sometimes it is best…just never easy to do!

  10. I’ve been there.. I know how hard it is. Years ago I had to do the same thing with my oldest and it was the best thing I could have done for him. He took a different path and walked out of the crowd that was bringing him down. He didn’t realize it at the time. He just knew he had to find a place to live and I wouldn’t allow him to move back in with me. Talk about feeling like a terrible mother. He ended up moving in with his dad and that helped repair their relationship, made him move out of state and away from the “bad” crowd. There are times we are helping our children more with tough love, than if we are always there to give them the easy way out. Kudus to you. Be strong, and know you’re actually helping your child more, by not “helping” them out of a tough situation.

  11. clgossett says:

    Not easy at all! Thanks Kristy!

  12. clgossett says:

    It sucks. Since you know that my kids are 23, 18, 6, and 4, you can understand that this hurts even more. I hope I never have to do this again. 🙁

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