Insanity Is Not An Option

Welcome to the Asylum!

  • Home
  • About Me
    • Copyright / Disclaimer
    • PR Friendly / Contact Info
    • Privacy Policy
  • Island Living
  • Recipes
  • Family
  • Crafting

Raising a Tween Girl is Hard, Y’all!

By Christy 1 Comment

So your daughter’s a tween and you’re ready to pull your hair out. She makes you laugh, she makes you cry. Unfortunately, it’s totally normal! Mom of 6 here to share some lessons (warnings?) you need to know about raising a tween girl!

So your daughter's a tween and you're ready to pull your hair out. She makes you laugh, she makes you cry. Unfortunately, it's totally normal! Mom of 6 here to share some lessons (warnings?) you need to know about raising a tween girl!

When did she become a tween?!?

If you’re like me, you’re not sure how it happened. One day your sweet, adorable, innocent baby girl woke up with a mouth full of sass and your whole world changed. And it sure as hell wasn’t for the better! As the mother of six (four of them girls), I’ve been through this before – although not to the level my Bug has taken this phase. I’m here to share a few tips for saving your ever-loving sanity until it all passes. Yes, it passes. Pinky swear!

So your daughter's a tween and you're ready to pull your hair out. She makes you laugh, she makes you cry. Unfortunately, it's totally normal! Mom of 6 here to share some lessons (warnings?) you need to know about raising a tween girl!

Encourage her to enjoy her youth!

Remember that time your tween turned 12? Yes, the epitome of tweendom. Stuck smack dab in between being a little girl and a full-fledge teen? Yea, that birthday! Kylee turned 12 in September. She felt she was too old for a party. Didn’t think the cake and candle lighting really suited her maturity level. Surprise gifts are for babies; gift cards are better suited for tweens, of course. All of those things – every single one of them – are for babies. You know what? I didn’t listen (I rarely do when it’s for the better good).

I sent her on her way with her older sister, and her dad and I decorated her entire room in Paris-themed decor (note: I respected her desire to travel one day, but still did the whole surprise thing). She was thrilled when she got home!

I invited her BFF to come over for dinner, cake, and spend the night. It was a welcome surprise!

I ordered the unicorn cake, paid way too much for it, and the smile on her face was worth every penny. She still loves unicorns – so do I – and I just want to encourage her to enjoy the magical things in life as long as she can before this whole ridiculous world tries to cut her down as I know it will.

So your daughter's a tween and you're ready to pull your hair out. She makes you laugh, she makes you cry. Unfortunately, it's totally normal! Mom of 6 here to share some lessons (warnings?) you need to know about raising a tween girl!

Not what you say, how you say it!

I need for you to let this one sink in. Say it with me…it’s not what you say, it’s how you say it! This goes for both of you…every day…all the time. Raising a tween girl is hard, y’all. So, so hard.

When that sassy mouth opens, you just never know what’s going to come out. Whether it’s something a teacher said at school today, an outfit gone wrong, a ponytail that just won’t go up exactly right (this one causes MELT DOWNS in my house), it’s not what she’s saying that is always the issue, it’s typically HOW she’s saying it. Your tween (like mine) can tell you about a great accomplishment and make you walk away feeling like you just got run over by a bus. Because…attitude.

Be her biggest fan!

Remind her that you are there to share in her joys, accomplishments, fears, successes, and failures – that you’re her biggest fan. Then remind her that if she’d tell you all of those things in her non-bitch voice (probably not the best words to use!), you’d be more attentive because we all really want to be attentive and involved in our kids’ lives no matter what!

But the same goes for you (yes, mom and dad, I’m eyeballing you!). Just because your tween daughter has a sassy mouth does NOT mean you can retaliate with more sass than she could ever muster (because, let’s face it, we’ve got all the experience). First, let me point out that it’s totally acceptable to roll your eyes – I, myself, am a master. It’s totally not OK to sass back. I’m as guilty as the rest, but truly have never seen a positive outcome from our sass-fests and so, I try to avoid them. Instead, I walk away until she gets the hint. I take her phone. No, you can’t go to your friends house. I do all the things an adult should do until she relents. We both win and it typically results in laughter and silliness – both of which are my favorite things to enjoy with my tween!

So your daughter's a tween and you're ready to pull your hair out. She makes you laugh, she makes you cry. Unfortunately, it's totally normal! Mom of 6 here to share some lessons (warnings?) you need to know about raising a tween girl!

Promote positivity!

Whether your daughter is into sports, cheer, singing, dancing, theater, leadership…it doesn’t matter. If it’s a positive force in her life, encourage it! Make yourself available. I know you’re busy – we all are these days – but you can be there to get her to practice on time, to cheer her on, to just show you care. That goes a long way; I know from experience.

In high school, I cheered. I loved to cheer. We had buses back then to drive us home from practice so my parents didn’t need to be involved there (lucky bastards!). I will tell you though, although I had very loving and supportive parents, I can count on one hand the number of times they came to watch me cheer. I never told them it hurt to look up and not see them, but it did. When I walk into the stadium where Bug is cheering, I make sure I walk right by her and wave before taking a seat. She always smiles the biggest smile. That gesture can move mountains during a very uncertain time in their lives. Just be present! It matters!

So your daughter's a tween and you're ready to pull your hair out. She makes you laugh, she makes you cry. Unfortunately, it's totally normal! Mom of 6 here to share some lessons (warnings?) you need to know about raising a tween girl!

Embrace her individuality!

You do you, Boo! That’s kind of overused by now, but it totally applies when you’re raising a tween girl. Encourage her to be unique. It’s important for girls at this age to “fit in”, but they sure as hell don’t have to be Stepford kids and it’s our job to help them understand that. My Kylee is unique, very much so, and she’s learned to accept the person that she is and actually love herself. She has her moments of doubt, but it’s in those moments that I make sure I’m there, encouraging my unicorn, and guiding her into her next magical phase in life.

So your daughter's a tween and you're ready to pull your hair out. She makes you laugh, she makes you cry. Unfortunately, it's totally normal! Mom of 6 here to share some lessons (warnings?) you need to know about raising a tween girl!

Best parenting award goes to…

Am I saying I’m the world’s best parent and I have this tween parenting thing down? Hell, no! I fail at the above from time and time, and I get so frustrated with my daughter that I wonder why I ever decided to have so many damned kids. But then I look at her and I realize that although she’s going through this difficult phase and she’s stuck between a woman and a child – so to speak – she’s doing OK. She’s got A’s and B’s in school (go Bug!), she’s a cheerleader and she’s good at it, she’s first chair bassoon in the school band, and her teachers really seem to like her. That’s how I measure success. So am I the world’s best parent? Not even close. Am I doing well raising a tween girl? You bet your ass I am!

Good luck to you and yours. Believe me, the years will pass, you’ll both forget how incredibly trying this brief period was, and believe it or not, you’ll become best friends again some day. It all happens in the blink of an eye. Enjoy every second and for heaven’s sake…DON’T BLINK!

Filed Under: Aging with Grace, Bugisms, Family, Life, Moms, My Kids Are Cooler Than Yours, my sparkles, Parenting, Things I Love Tagged With: first time mom, mature moms, parental problems, parenting, raising daughters, raising tweens, self help for moms

Today, The Brightest Soul I Know Turns 9

By Christy Leave a Comment

What do you do when your youngest child suddenly turns nine? You celebrate, you buy XBox games, and you cry a little inside. Today, the brightest soul I know turns nine!

What do you do when your youngest child, the youngest of six, suddenly turns nine? You celebrate, you buy XBox games, and you cry a little inside. Today, the brightest soul I know turns 9!

My Bubby, my baby, the last of a lineage, turns nine today and as proud as I am of this brilliant and funny boy of mine, I can’t help being a little melancholy. Watching him grow and become the wonderful person he is has been a life-altering experience for me. He, quite literally, amazes me every single day with his wealth of knowledge, his beautiful sense of humor, and his obvious lack of common sense.

He can pass a STAAR test with ease at grade levels well above his own, he can spout random facts (that his teachers and I often have to Google to verify) about ancient Egyptians or sea creatures, yet when you point to something “over there” that you need, he can’t figure out where that is. And don’t even get me started on his “punny” sense of humor. He’s such a little old man wrapped in such a beautiful package and I love him to pieces.

the brightest soul i know turns 9 today

But he’s growing up on me…way too fast…and I’d love for time to stop for just a bit so I can just enjoy his little self just a little bit longer. Yes, he’ll always be my baby and I believe that “huggy time” will always be a thing, but his independence is starting to shine, which I encourage, and that’s a little hard on this doting momma.

Enough of my whining though. Time to celebrate the brightest soul I know. He’d give you the shirt off his back, he’d gladly give you his last dollar (but probably not his last XBox game), and he’s always there to lift anyone up when they’re down. He’s as perfect as I’d hoped he’d be nine years and eight months ago when I found out about him, and he’ll do amazing things in this world. Watch him, you’ll see!

So, today, Zachary Alexander Gossett turns nine years old. He’s growing into a fine, caring, productive human being and I couldn’t be more proud of my little man. Thank you, Bub, for making my life complete and allowing me to be your mom. I love you more than the world is big, more than the sky is blue. Enjoy your last year in the single digits and always remember, enjoy being a kid for as long as you can. It all goes by in a flash! You’re doing a really phenomenal job at this life thing and I’m oh-so proud to be your mommy!

Filed Under: Anniversaries, Bubby, Family, Family Traditions, Life, Moms, My Favorite Things, My Happy Life, My Kids Are Cooler Than Yours, Parenting, Things I Love Tagged With: baby boy, Bubby, child birthday, child growing up

Are Your Boos Ready with Halloween Costumes?

By Christy Leave a Comment

Busy Mom Alert: You can still be your kids’ Halloween hero without leaving the couch! Did you know that there are affordable options for Halloween Costumes online? Just so you know, the kind folks at Oriental Trading® did send me costumes for this post, but the opinions are entirely my own.

Busy Mom Alert: You can still be your kids' Halloween hero without leaving the couch! Did you know that there are affordable options for Halloween Costumes online?

Halloween! It’s everything, right? OK, it’s not Christmas, but it’s a really close second. I have a Halloween baby and it’s a big deal in my house. A really big deal. But what’s a busy mom to do when she wants to make sure her kids are clad in the best costumes in town, but she doesn’t have a bunch of time for shopping, traveling from shop to shop, or worrying about sizing? She turns to Oriental Trading®, of course, right from her couch! The fact that her kids look amazing on Halloween (OK, I’m talking about myself and my own kids here) is a true win. Want to be a Halloween hero this year, and every year, too? Follow my advice because these costumes are amazing, affordable, and SIMPLE for mom. I’m a Halloween hero and I didn’t even try!

Busy Mom Alert: You can still be your kids' Halloween hero without leaving the couch! Did you know that there are affordable options for Halloween Costumes online now?

See, just like with my Halloween decor, I logged into Oriental Trading®, and I let the kids do the work. They picked out their costumes, I pressed a button, and done. DONE. Ninja, Gothic Prom Queen, and skeletons…oh my. Oh, how I love my simple life!

Busy Mom Alert: You can still be your kids' Halloween hero without leaving the couch! Did you know that there are affordable options for Halloween Costumes online now?

Are Your Boos Ready with Halloween Costumes?

I ordered the costumes, headed to the dollar store to pick up some extra props, and I’m a Halloween hero without taking out a second mortgage. Seriously, this holiday stuff can get expensive if you don’t know where to shop! Plus, how cute is he? I know, I know…cute as a button, in a threatening sort of way, of course.

Busy Mom Alert: You can still be your kids' Halloween hero without leaving the couch! Did you know that there are affordable options for Halloween Costumes online now?

Plus, having all of the best (and affordable decor) for photo ops is amazing because we, as moms, need all of the pictures we can muster to savor every memory!

Busy Mom Alert: You can still be your kids' Halloween hero without leaving the couch! Did you know that there are affordable options for Halloween Costumes online now?

I can’t wait for the actual night of all Hallow’s Eve. With the outside decor, plus the amazing backdrops in the house, there are so many memories to be made and cherished for years to come. What are you waiting for? The clock is ticking. Halloween is JUST around the corner. Be a Halloween hero this year! Your kids will thank you for it, and so will your bank account!

Filed Under: Family Meals, Family Traditions, Holidays, Moms, My Favorite Things, My Happy Life, My Kids Are Cooler Than Yours, Oriental Trading, Parenting Tagged With: costumes, halloween, imagination, Oriental Trading

  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • …
  • 9
  • Next Page »

Welcome to the asylum!

Hey y'all! I'm Christy and I'm glad you could stop by. Have a seat, grab a drink or a straight jacket, and join me as I share heart-healthy recipes, stories and life lessons about my insanely large family, and whatever else pops into my hot mess of a mind! Read More…

Looking for something?

Let’s Get Social!

  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • Twitter
  • YouTube
Copyright © 2021 Insanity Is Not An Option