1st Day of School 2015: The Making of a Meltdown

The first day of school is a joyous occasion for many, a new year of learning and making new friends. But in our house, it’s often the making of a meltdown. I’m never sure who is going to breakdown, be it me or one of the kids, but I know it’s bound to happen. How do you deal with a childhood meltdown? Here’s our story of the first day of school 2015!

The first day of school: The Making of a Meltdown

The first day of school around our house is a pretty big deal. We bend the rules significantly during the summer months and truly give the babies a break. It’s always been that way in our house, with all 6 kids, but possibly more with the youngest two for obvious reasons (hello, I’m not ready to let go of two more AND I know how quickly it passes). But with that said, when school time rolls around, specifically the day before, it gets real up in here. The day before is chaotic at best, scrambling around to get last-minute supplies ready, lunches made, uniforms laid out, dinner on the table on time, BED TIME…that kind of thing. I anticipate the meltdown. I never quite know who is going to have it in the morning, whether it be me or one of the kids or a combination of both, but it’s sure to happen. For us, a high-strung family, the first day of school is always the making of a meltdown. 

The first day of school 2015 actually started out lovely. Everyone up on time. Lunches made. Breakfast on the table. Supplies at the door. Smiles on our faces. Was this going to be the first year without a major meltdown? My hopes were high. We got out the door in more than plenty of time, stopped to take the obligatory “by the door” first day of school photo, and off we went, still smiling and in great moods, just the babies and I.

How stressful is the first day of school at your house?

Got to school and the kids seemed happy, eager almost. Oh no, are my babies growing up? They don’t need me anymore. The what? Maybe it was my year for another meltdown. Fingers crossed, we were ready.

Major meltdowns and the first day of school
Seriously, it was all going so well, I was sure that this was going to be the best first day of school ever!

Were you ready for the first day of school?

We got there early as we typically do (if you really knew me, you’d find this quite surprising…possibly humorous) so we headed to the gym to meet up with old friends and wait for the start of a new year of learning. Third and first grade, y’all. When did they grow up? Stop that! Bub, first grade check in and line up…check!

Happy 3rd graders ready for school

As I looked over at my “big” girl (she tends to meltdown as much as her momma does) and saw her smiling face after she told me that I didn’t need to walk her to class this year *sigh* because she “had this” and I should take care of Bubby since he’s only in first grade, I was both happy and sad to let go all at the same time. I was beginning to believe the meltdown would belong to me this year. But Kylee Bug was happy, Bubby was happy, I “had this” too.

First day of first grade 2015

Best year EV-AH! Second year of school and this little man was a born natural. He blends in so well, he’s happy to reunite with his BFF, and he’s just eager to learn. He truly “has this“. Bittersweet, but I love seeing him thrive and I thought I’d get out unscathed.

1st day of school was a success

Sat him down, he went right to work, intent on being the next big thing because he’s going to learn and he’ll go places. I was going to get out without a tear. No tears. No meltdowns. It was like the perfect morning.

Until…I turned around to walk out. Standing just behind me, in the back of Bubby’s room, was my Bug. Full of tears, trembling, and sweating. She had gone to her classroom, she had remembered her horrible experience last year at school, she’d had a meltdown.

My 3rd grader had a meltdown. How do you cope with the first day of school?

I wasn’t in the room with her when it hit her, so she found me, exactly where she knew I’d be. Still settling her little brother in, as I would have her had she let me in the first place. I said one last goodbye to Bubby, who hardly noticed I was still in the room, and then my baby girl and I walked, hand in hand, toward her classroom while she sobbed and I tried to console her. As a mom, that’s brutal. It’s the worst kind of meltdown. I’d rather have a meltdown any day than to watch any one of my children have one. It was a long walk down the hall.

It was very hard to walk her down that hall while she trembled and I fought back tears. I couldn’t let her see my tears.

We made it to her classroom (felt like 30 minutes), and I tried to tell her things would be different this year. Her teacher is awesome (so hopeful) and she’s an amazing girl that needs to learn incredible things. Her friends were waiting. They looked almost as concerned as I was. But the sobbing, the trembling, and the sweating continued. That meltdown was real, y’all, and I felt helpless.

I had her call her daddy because he always makes her feel better. Didn’t work.

I talked to her, her teacher, and her BFF once more. Didn’t work. Best bet was to leave with a big hug. She’d be better. She’d be fine. She’s tough. My little hot mess is always fine. But she wasn’t, and at that point, neither was I.

Against my (over doting parent) better judgement, I walked away. After all of these years, I know it’s the right thing to do. It hurt. She ran out of the room, she chased me down the hallway, she BEGGED me to take her home.

I walked her back to her room, told her I loved her, and left as I should have done. I left sad, dry eyed, but trembling…just like my baby girl. Because I should have. Because I had to. Because she WILL have a better year. She’s going to have an amazing year.

Upon later checkin, her tears dried up in about 10 minutes. Oddly enough, I think I took them from her because when I got to my car, I had a meltdown. I sat there, I cried, I trembled, and I sweat for 15 full minutes before I could regain my composure and drive home.

She’s fine now, I didn’t come away unscathed. I’ve been a parent for 25 full years and it just never gets easy. It’s always worth it, but it’s never easy.

This morning? I anticipated a meltdown, I did everything possible to avoid the first day of school meltdown, we were doing so well.

This morning? Another meltdown happened, for no reason at all, but for so many reasons. I’m ready to tuck another (two actually) meltdown under my belt and have a GREAT school year. Who’s with me? I can’t be the only one, we can’t be the only family, that goes through this.

I see other meltdowns on the first day of school and I always feel the parent’s pain, the kid’s pain. If this happens to you, how do you deal with the meltdowns and HOW do you come away feeling OK? Because, honestly, I never feel totally OK again after one of my kids loses it!

Happy Calm Focused: A WAHM’s Best Friend

When life gets hectic, a mom has to turn to something for help. If you find yourself struggling with sleep, emotional control, or just an overall nervous feeling, I highly recommend trying Happy Calm Focused. The supply of Happy Calm Focused that I received to facilitate this post has been helping this WAHM stay more on task, stay in control of my emotions, and get a good night’s sleep.

Stay Calm with Happy, Calm, Focused

We all know life can get hectic and we all think, at least at times, that our lives are more overwhelming than others. I’m a full-time work from home mom of 6 kids from the ages of 25 down to 6, I’m married, and I manage my household. I cook daily, I drop the kids off at school, pick them up, deal with the chaos while taking calls from my grown children about whatever might be happening, good or bad, in their lives that day. I handle all of our finances and my husband works ridiculous hours and teaches school at night. All of this to say, I get overwhelmed, as we all do.

The Life of a SAHM: The Night I Lost My Shit #momlife

About a month ago, I realized that I wasn’t handling the stress as well as I used to. Basically, I lost my junk and it wasn’t pretty. I was losing my focus for work, home, just about everything, and tasks weren’t getting completed. I was losing my temper more than I care to admit, I wasn’t sleeping, and I was a nervous wreck more times than not. Diet and exercise just weren’t doing the trick anymore. That’s when I heard about Happy Calm Focused and decided to give it a try. I mean, it couldn’t hurt, right?

I was hoping for instant gratification, a miracle “cure” for what ailed me. That was a lofty and ridiculous hope and I knew it, so I wasn’t disappointed when I didn’t feel any changes immediately. After about 2 weeks, although I hadn’t noticed any real changes, I realized that I was feeling particularly rested, we were getting to school on time every day without drama, my to do list wasn’t nearly as unchecked at the end of the day as it had been, and I wasn’t flipping out over trivial things. I realized that I had been actually sleeping through most of the night for the first time in a long time, and although I was still feeling overwhelmed, I seemed to be handling things more calmly and rationally.

From that point on, I noticed subtle changes and I felt my old self coming back slowly. After a full month of taking HCF, I’m a calmer, more level headed, more productive person again. I find myself laughing more than crying or yelling, and I just feel BETTER. I still flip out from time to time, but that’s my nature since I’ve always been high strung and a true perfectionist. I will say that I haven’t changed anything else about my lifestyle. I still eat my vegetarian diet and exercise daily, and all of my tasks are still the same as they were before, so the only thing I can attribute to this change in my mood, my overall well being, is HCF.

If you find yourself struggling with sleep, emotional control, or just an overall nervous feeling, I highly recommend trying HCF. To find out more about this natural miracle “drug”, like them on Facebook and follow them on Twitter. Here’s to a calmer, happier, more focused life for both you and I!

A Day in the Life of a WAHM: The Night I Lost My Shit!

The Life of a SAHM: The Night I Lost My Shit #momlife

Being a work at home mom has its perks. Like a lot of perks. I can work in my jammies, I often do. I can set my own schedule to an extent. But it’s not all sunshine and lollipops and last night, I kind of lost my shit. OK, I totally lost my shit. Like all the shits I had totally went out the window. I stopped giving shits and it might have been past time. Let me back up and explain yesterday, every day in fact, so that you can understand how my days go. Strap yourself in because you’re about to live the day in the life of a WORK at home mom.

I wake up between 5:30 and 6:00 am. I get breakfast for the babies, take out their vitamins, pour their drinks, and take their lunches out of the frig that I prepared the night before. I pour a cup of coffee (hello!) and take the dog out to potty. I wake the babies up by 6:15 am with a “good morning, it’s going to be a great day!”, and sit them down for breakfast. There’s typically a fight that I ignore. I hold my shit and encourage them to finish their breakfast, get dressed, go brush their teeth, brush their hair, grab their book bags, get out the door. This should be a 30 minute routine since everything is laid out for them. It’s typically no less than 45 minutes. Oh well. Into the car we go at 7:00 am, 15-20 minute drive to school.

7:15 am…I drop them off with a kiss goodbye, a hug, and a, “Bug, be good, you can do this!” and a “Bubby, be a good boy and learn something new you can teach mommy”. 20 minutes back home if traffic agrees.

WAHM log, daily, 7:35 am…I’m home. Time for bon bons, alone time, and Jerry Springer. OK, so I really do turn the channel on for Jerry Springer’s hot mess of a show that will come on at 8:00 am, but not to watch, just because I need the white noise. I’m used to arguing. Apparently I can’t work without it. Plus, what’s a bon bon for real?

7:55 am, clean up the mess from the night before, sit down, schedule up socials, write down my to do list for a day of work…oh wait…I forgot…I need to run upstairs and brush my teeth and hair, I might have meetings today! Plus…hygiene!

8:00 am…sit down at my computer and really get to work. Real work, people. I have a job. People don’t realize that because I don’t PREACH, but I work ALL DAY LONG for money. I have meetings (yes, from home), I have deadlines, I have people working for me (shut up…I laugh at that too). I manage a product, a new launch, there’s stress. Oh, and while I work my 8 hours at my real job (I might work more than that), I’m also dealing with calls from school nurses and teachers, paying bills, filing taxes (OK, I’m behind on that), cleaning up the house, doing laundry (no folding required), balancing checkbooks, making shopping lists, figuring out what’s for dinner, and occasionally I get to delve into this silly blog of mine. From home…until 3:00 pm (sans shower and food I might add…who has time for that?).

3:00 pm…I close down the computer, walk the dog, set the alarm, and head out the door for the 20-minute drive to pick the babies up from school. Yesterday, I got a call from the school nurse on the way that helped me on my lose-my-shit journey for the evening. Pick them up, typically head to the grocery store for staples, then home.

4:00 pm…more work. Remember, full time job? Yea, that. Emails have been coming in while I was gone, tasks haven’t been completed. I work my “real” job while I prepare dinner, help with homework that refuses to get done (Bug..do it!), get out uniforms for the next day (that I dig from the unfolded pile of laundry I did that day), prepare lunches for the next day, and listen to spoiled children argue about what they will and won’t eat, what Wii or whatever games they do/don’t want to play, and TELL me what they like/don’t like for dinner. All the while, I work, I clean up messes, I cook, I lay out clothes, I prepare lunches, and I accommodate.

Every day. Every night. Accommodate. Quietly accommodate while B works outside of the home and teaches school twice a week. Just me and my bon bon schedule. I hold my shit.

This time? Bug refused to do her homework…again. Bubby had no interest in what we were eating. In fact, he demanded I heat up the deep fryer to cook him his favorite chicken nuggets despite the fact that there was a full meal cooked. Bug snuck in the frig and stole some cherries. I looked around, still having work to do, lunches to fix, clothes to lay out, and they had crap everywhere. No one to help me.

6:00 pm…nothing felt right. Work wasn’t done, homework (Bug’s only) wasn’t done, clothes weren’t laid out, dinner wasn’t eaten, lunches weren’t made. It was a hot mess in here and I’d had it.

7:00 pm…I LOST MY SHIT. I took all of the toys, the clothes they’d thrown in the floor, the books from homework not done…I threw it all in the middle of the floor and I told them to get their stuff together. Get it cleaned up, including the attitudes, or get it gone.

7:02 pm…man, it got quiet in here.

7:05 – 8:30 pm…I got a lot of work done. A LOT.

9:00 pm…cleaned up, bed time, calm. But, I’d lost my shit. All but that is the typical life of a WAHM.

9:15 pm…back in the kitchen for dinner clean up, lunch prep, breakfast prep, lay out the clothes, and a double check of what I forgot to do for work today. Another hour or 2, I might regain my shit. I’ll get caught back up and I’ll be ready to face 5:30 am where it starts all over again.

12:00 am – 2:00 am – Sometime between this window, I usually give up and go to sleep.

5:30 am…Oh, you know.

Anyway, the life of a WAHM has awesome benefits. I totally love my life. I love my family, my husband, my kids, my job. Typically everything is awesome. But before you think we sit around and eat bon bons and do nothing all day? STFU! Some days, a lot of days, are AWESOME, but some days aren’t. Those are the days, on the rare occasion we forget to regain our composure, that we completely lose our shit. Last night, I lost my shit.

I’m not proud. But sometimes…when your kids feel too privileged and don’t know what a struggle really is since they’ve never experienced one…when life gets overwhelming? That’s when you schedule “lose your shit” in at around 7:00 pm and hope for a better day tomorrow.