What’s your 2020 word of the year? 2019 was harsh and unkind in our world. In 2020, we choose to FLOURISH! Flourish by definition means to grow or develop in a healthy or vigorous way, especially as the result of a particularly favorable environment.

How did 2019 treat you?

In 2019, I had a year of struggles. I went through a divorce after 16 years of marriage (18 years together), lost touch with loved ones because of the split, had to give up my home, moved miles away, dealt with a teen who wasn’t ready for hormones, let alone a change to her entire life. I even made a huge personal mistake that has been plaguing me (financially and emotionally) throughout the year.

Although I held my ground, I kept my job, I paid the bills (and his), I didn’t flourish…at all. I made some new friends, lost some more, but I made it through…because there’s no other option. It was a bad year. A year of trials, a year of tears, a year of pitfalls, life lessons, and independence.

I survived and rid myself of decades of toxins and abuse, and I raised my daughter in the best way I knew how…with love and as much understanding and empathy as I could muster. I wasn’t necessarily strong though any of this, but there’s something to be said about survival during times of loss and depression, rebirth and growth.

How will you make 2020 great?

For me, 2020 (the year and this new decade) will be a time of promises to myself. If I can’t accept myself, be proud of myself, love myself and what I do, I cannot make others happy, and I cannot flourish. In an effort to stand my ground and follow through with my promises, I’m putting them down here to hold myself accountable. There’s also something to be said about accountability when things don’t seem as “easy” as you’d hoped.

1. Let my creativity flow for a happier heart! I’ve all but given up on this little speck on the internet. It was a passion project I started years ago as a way to grow, share my knowledge and failures with other parents so that they could hopefully learn from my parental milestones and mistakes (there are many of both). I still feel I have a lot to offer and although this may not be the money maker it once was, it holds so much of my heart so I owe it my time, my love, and I long to share our highs and lows again. I’ve written about 20 posts this year, published maybe one. Time for a change in my strategy again!
2. Be proud and love myself! Boasting isn’t OK, but neither is allowing yourself to be a doormat, failing to tout your own accomplishments, or letting people know your worth. In 2020, I’m making a promise to be kinder to myself and learn that it’s OK to be proud of all that I’ve accomplished in my life and all that I continue to excel at.
3. Be a better mother! I’m a good mom, I really am, but in light of the circumstances created by the events of 2019, I’ve leaned more toward friendship and less toward mom. I’ve let things slide that I would have never in the past in an effort to make everyone happy. In doing this, I’ve not encouraged Kylee to flourish in a way that I know she can. She has a new lease on life, a great life without abuse now. I need to encourage her to succeed and sometimes that takes more tough love than I’ve been willing to dole out. I’ll continue to be her friend and show her empathy, however, I promise that I will be a mom again first!
4. Flourish! I don’t merely have to survive anymore. I need to live again, flourish, and enjoy this new lease on life. A flourish is an extra touch — a trumpet’s ta-ta-da! announcing a king’s entrance, a fancy carving atop an otherwise utilitarian pillar, a wave of a flag, or a cheerleader’s pompom. I have always been – and will continue to be – everyone else’s cheerleader. It’s time I do the same for myself since no one else will and I deserve it!
5. Live by my own mantra! Throughout 2019, actually throughout the past decade, I’ve been asking myself if I have enough strength to make it through. I’ve let my health decline, both mentally and physically, and sleepless nights and anxiety are a way of life. The truth of the matter is, financially, I’m doing fine; professionally, I’m doing quite well; and personally, I have friends and family in my corner. For just those three factors, I need to remind myself daily that insanity is not an option and I’m not only going to be “just OK”, but rather I will flourish, be content, and finally be happy again!

What is your 2020 word of the year?

So, on this 1st day of January, 2020, these are my promises to me. Happy New Year to one and all! May your year, and decade, be blessed with love, light, and prosperity. This is the year to flourish; seize the opportunity.