This baby was born yesterday. YESTERDAY! But here she is, ready and willing to take on 1st grade. That’s just not right. She’s independent, head strong, and growing up quicker than her momma wants to admit. She’s not ready to face the world of course, but she is ready to face 1st grade without tears. I wish I was that ready.
As I woke them for the first day of Bug’s new adventure, I was scared. I was scared for her, I was scared that she’d cry. I was mostly scared for me.
You see, this is my baby girl, and watching her grow up so quickly is both joyous and painful. But she was ready. Another school year. More things to learn. A new adventure.
But I have a hard time letting go. Watching her smirk as she readied herself for this new adventure hurt my heart. I’ll just be honest.
BUT seeing her sit down in that classroom, like she owned it, while I put supplies in bins, killed me. I’m happy for her. I’m proud of her. But it makes me sad. She still needs me, but she doesn’t. She’s got this. She’s not a baby anymore. She has friends, people outside of me, that make her happy. This makes me happy. But it makes me sad.
Call me selfish. Calm me stupid. Say I’m a moron. I don’t care. I miss the days when I was her everything. I’m proud beyond words that my baby blends, but I miss the days when she “needed” me.
Soar on baby girl. Mommy’s just feeling nostalgic. I really want you to shine, and I’m so proud of your independent little self. You’e still my world and I’m so happy you’re doing “your” thing. You amaze me!